Any of you who've read a few of my recent posts know I am on a makeover mission. It has nothing to do with shape and size, or trying to look better. I'm in pretty good shape for my current one, or as some might say, I maintain. Anymore,I don't spend much time in front of mirrors. This rehabilitation campaign is not about those things.

A part of it I worked on today was about driving. To lean a little on an old cliche, ignorance may be real bliss. Before coming to Denver my driving was mostly short jaunts around town, to schools and church, and trips to the grocery store. I drove a few places other than that, but not many, except one trip, about a hundred miles long, when I drove my mother inlaw back to her house, but that's another story.

In the fifties and sixties, driver training was not required. If you could pass the test they gave, a little driving, and a written one, you got your license. You wouldn't believe how good I got at pulling forward, and then backing up in our narrow driveway.

Then I progressed to roads around town, but nothing like today in Denver. But before that point in time I drove many years, in my little unautomatic puddle jumper Baha Bronze with racing stripes down each side, bucket seated Gremlin. Remember the silly commercial, about "Lady, where's the rest of your car?" Some did laugh at its unusual looks, but it had a twenty one gallon gas tank, and got good mileage, and I'd just fill it up, and drive and drive and drive, in my simple world of then.
Some might not believe that I learned how to change the air filter, and check fluid levels, but I did. I didn't change the oil, but I knew to get it done.

All the way to Texas, and once to California, I drove, alone. On the Texas trip a New Mexico patrolman pulled me over. Traffic was light. Weather was good, Nobody was bumping anybody. Still he seemed upset, because I wasn't driving in the lane he thought I should. Both lanes went the same direction. I couldn't understand why he was ticked off about which one I used, but I got into the one he motioned toward, and like he said, stayed in it until I got out of his state.

On my way to California, When I reached Utah, things got scary. I somehow ended up too close to what looked like some lakes, and there was a lot of sand. I'm still not sure where I was, but kept going different directions, and finally got back onto a safer looking road. The patrolman talking a little ugly to me in New Mexico only hurt my feelings, because he made me feel so dumb. Being lost in Utah, and night about to fall scared me very much, but somehow I got safely back to Denver. That's where I seem to always return.

Things are much different here now. In the late sixties I don't think I-25 had yet been made. Now there's three lanes each way all around, before you get close to the interstates. I'm a little imtimidated, not by the number of lanes, but traffic's faster speed. Still, if I'm to live here, and get where I need to go, I can't revert to driving the chicken trail easy roads I drove not long ago.

So today, although I had already decided to exercise some courage, and defeat this fear, when I read daughter Bev's, "Blessed Beyond Measure", The Cowardly Lion", I knew it was time. So I posted a few words to Bev about how excellently she writes, and turned off the computer, put my shoes on, and I was out the door, telling myself some little fear wouldn't defeat me.

If we don't pay close attention to them, thoughts and emotions can work us over. It all depends. As I walked to my car I noticed a big delivery truck, easing along right where I needed to go. You need to know I'm mostly very patient, sometimes too much, but today I felt irritable toward the stranger whose job it was to drive the truck. It hardly took a moment for him to go, but I just wanted him out of my way.

I headed toward a road I've only driven once. To get to where I was going wasn't far, less than a mile. I watched the traffic and lights, telling myself if where I needed to turn left was congested, I'd drive ahead and circle back. First challenge done with, the way was very clear and turning was easy. I went on. and soon found the place I was looking for, a bank. but because I wasn't familiar with the area, I parked too far away. Oh well, I got out of the car, and walked the rest of the way, right up a sidewalk. I'm getting upset again. Geese apparently come here too, and leave their droppings right where I needed to walk. I looked around, and decided it was easier to tip toe around it, and just get on to the bank.

Inside, that's right, I'm irked again. The clerk has an accent that's hard to understand, and when he starts pushing,it seemed to me, for me to make some investments, I tell him not today, but he mentions it again, and again. Promising myself I'll read "Boundaries" again, I tell him thanks but no thanks, and no, I don't want anybody to call me about it, and leave. But I still have to make my way through all those geese droppings again. As I leave the bank I promise myself to not walk this way next time. but I still need to get across the street to my car.

When traffic slows in one direction, it comes at me from the other. Three times I wait for it, but more comes through. I'm grumbling again now, and not so silently.
Why do they go so fast, I think, as I turn and walk through more geese droppings to a corner with traffic lights. In my mind I'm trying to remember where another bank branch may be.

Not far away is a grocery chain that's going out of business, and discounted prices call. So I take time to check them out. A banner across the front of the store says 25% off, but inside prices vary. That's awful I grumble silently, and anyway their regular prices are already too high, I whisper almost out loud.

When I finally get to the checkout line, a shopper pulls in front of my cart, and Irritation rises again. I'm tempted to tell her I was there first, but don't, and just stand in line. I'm feeling really grouchy, and don't know why, but decide to be nice to her anyway. A man is with her and they look like they may be poor. When our turns are next she turns to me and smiles, and says for me to go first. In a big city where eye contact can be rare, I'm touched that she showed kindness, and glad I wasn't rude. Man o man, my emotions are hopping all over the place today.


I'm still wondering if I can get the bargains without my card. I ask the clerk and he's very nice as he rings up the sale, especially when you consider his job is about to end. I pay the bill and thank him for helping me, and leave.

In my car I figure out which way and how far to get back home, and make the right turns and quickly drive it. As irritation I wasn't aware I had gave way to relief, I realized I had used it to mask my fear. Did I completly miss what Bev wrote about, To feel the fear, and not miss the blessing of letting God help us, and do what we must, anyway.

I suppose no one would like having to navigate around or through geese droppings. I'm still thinking about that when I realize they're probably the same geese I love seeing fly overhead around here. But if they keep acting like the bank's sidewalk is their porta-potty, I'm taking my money some place else.